The Scandinavian Aggressors: An Oral History of the Modern Viking Movement is the title of my forthcoming book, which accounts the glorious (and oftentimes not so glorious) deeds of the Vikings during their tumultuous 2004 reunion tour. After a short treatise on the nature of Scandinavian violence and the origins of the Modern Viking Movement, the book plunges headlong into a series of narrative dialogues. Readers will meet larger-than-life Viking heroes Trond "Troll-Breath" Trondsen, Björn Svensson, and Ingrid Törnblom as they tell of their ruthless quests to enslave leprechauns, decapitate Copenhagen's statue of The Little Mermaid, conquer England, and drink lots and lots of mead. A slew of lesser Vikings flesh out the book with their tales that include such things as the slaying of a retarded dragon, the razing of a doll's house in Oslo, and the suffering of horrendous digestive problems on the day of a fateful Icelandic jihad against the indigenous tribes of Greenland.

Needless to say, The Scandinavian Aggressors will be essential reading for anyone with even a remote interest in the Modern Viking Movement, mostly because it is the only book to have ever been written on the subject, but also because it is a darn good yarn about the fragility of the Scandinavian condition.

All material copyright © 2007 Rowdy Geirsson